What started out as a chilly day, ended up being beautiful. Today was filled with such things as my niece coming over this morning for a short visit. Then, I did some work in the studio, including some bookkeeping. I was very excited to see that we have stayed on budget this month for our family expenses. My goal is to not buy many groceries the rest of this month, but to use what we already have. If I can do this, it will mean that we only spent $300 on groceries for the month, and that makes me excited!! After lunch, I practiced the piano. I am hosting a recital along with my students in May, and I suppose the teacher should be prepared too. ha. Then, we enjoyed some outside family fun - walking, taking pictures of flowers, flying kites, and playing a game in the yard. Ah, good time. Now, just gotta cook, eat, get kids clean, and prepare for church in the a.m. What a great day!
I've recently been facing some struggles that have really taken a toll on me. These struggles, I must keep in mind, are spiritual. Some of the struggle has been intensified by my own thoughts and doings. I line up my thoughts and feelings with the Word of God. Then the next thing I know, I'm starting back at square one with the same pride and arrogance as before. Uggh. I get frustrated at myself. But when I humble myself before the Lord, He seems to be teaching me something - a lesson I thought I already knew: TRUST HIM.
Just when I think "Alright God. We've got this lesson checked off. I understand. Let's move on." He repeats the same lesson with a different scenario. See, it's not good enough to trust God in only some areas of my life. It requires trust in ALL areas of my life. That's hard. Why? Pride and arrogance. My actions and attitude sometimes (many times) prove that I think I know what is best. I try to take control. The scary part is that God will allow me to usurp that control if I am persistent, and that may seem great for a while. However, it will eventually backfire in someway, and God will not be glorified through me and my actions. Understand that God will always be glorified, but my actions and attitude can determine whether His glory will shine through me or in spite of me. I'm a work in progress, and there's a lesson in progress...once again. |